I'm spiraling out of control.
Shawn 2020-04-11
I have a sickness over which I don't know what to do about. I've been deeply depressed for about 5-6 years. My life has been full of doubt and suffering.
I really am losing the will to live. I'm thinking about suicide too much lately. On top of depression, I have some kind of other mental illness. It used to be defined as schizophrenia; but, I think it's some psychotic disorder. Who knows, maybe it is schizophrenia, it doesn't matter. What matters is that I'm spiraling into a dark abyss.
Things have gotten so bad that I am doubting my own thoughts, as if they were foreign to my-self along with dreams that seem foreign to myself also.
I'm really suffering and am already in contact for help, and have been taking anti-psychotics (2 actually) for a good while.
What should I do?
I really am losing the will to live. I'm thinking about suicide too much lately. On top of depression, I have some kind of other mental illness. It used to be defined as schizophrenia; but, I think it's some psychotic disorder. Who knows, maybe it is schizophrenia, it doesn't matter. What matters is that I'm spiraling into a dark abyss.
Things have gotten so bad that I am doubting my own thoughts, as if they were foreign to my-self along with dreams that seem foreign to myself also.
I'm really suffering and am already in contact for help, and have been taking anti-psychotics (2 actually) for a good while.
What should I do?
Comments (9)
The pills do not appear to be working, time to find a new doctor.
I have no faith in doctors of any kind, especially dentists. The guy that prescribed the medicine might have missed something, get a second or third opinion about it.
And stick with us here, don't do anything that you cannot regret later.
Hang in there, Shawn.
Just called my previous psych unit. Going back there, and planning a prolonged stay.
When are you headed back?
Like Sir said get the help and keep with us here. Together we will get through this :heart:
I wish you could build tolerance towards depression.
I'd have an insane tolerance to it...
An update: my friend who works in the toxicology lab in a NY hospital, the man I forwarded your idea to, has himself fallen ill to COVID 19. It is not surprising but alarming all the same as he quarentines with a baby just over a year old and his lovely wife. I hope he gets through this okay. Prior to working in NY he did an internship at a Jungle hospital in Peru and enjoyed the f#$& out of it. Ironic that I worried about him contracting something deadly in Peru but once he was home in NY I let my guard down because he was 'home'.
:pray:
Whatever happens make sure he lays on his stomach to ease breathing issues. Google it.
What a cruel sickness. :vomit: