Movie Pitches
Recently posted an fb thing of joke movie pitches. I thought I'd share here and also encourage anyone to post some fake pitches of their own. It's fun!
A Cigar for Mr Purington:
this is a movie that takes place in in colonial india in the late 1800s. An aged well-mustached british officer stands in front of a desk frowning pensively as he receivs telegram after telegram. Finally, 90 minutes later, he receives a telegram that makes him sigh in relief. 'To mr purington!" he says, and lights a cigar
Ghost Virus:
This is a movie where everyone gets a virus that turns them into ghosts and guess what the 'virus' is mortality itself
Hot Dog Cart
This is a movie about a hedge fund manager whose wife divorces him on account of shes a Leftist and didnt know what hedge funds were when she married him. Heartbroken and lost he decides to start a hot dog cart. Subjected daily to humiliation and 'The precarity of work under late capitalism' he decides to start a hot dog cart union and bring them all the way to the world series. When the leftist umpire at the world series tries to explain that unions are less about winning sports championships and more about class solidarity, he says 'yeah right tough guy'
Cowboys
five of the cowboys are in town and this time they mean it
Eternal Vigilance of Infinite Undiscovery
This is a movie that is actually a jrpg port for ps1. The game boots up on the silver screen and the projectionist cant figure out that you use circle instead of x to start the game, so its just 90 min of the title screen
Wheres my Porsche?
this is a movie ala dude wheres my car but its just a rich man who blames the valet
A Cigar for Mr Purington:
this is a movie that takes place in in colonial india in the late 1800s. An aged well-mustached british officer stands in front of a desk frowning pensively as he receivs telegram after telegram. Finally, 90 minutes later, he receives a telegram that makes him sigh in relief. 'To mr purington!" he says, and lights a cigar
Ghost Virus:
This is a movie where everyone gets a virus that turns them into ghosts and guess what the 'virus' is mortality itself
Hot Dog Cart
This is a movie about a hedge fund manager whose wife divorces him on account of shes a Leftist and didnt know what hedge funds were when she married him. Heartbroken and lost he decides to start a hot dog cart. Subjected daily to humiliation and 'The precarity of work under late capitalism' he decides to start a hot dog cart union and bring them all the way to the world series. When the leftist umpire at the world series tries to explain that unions are less about winning sports championships and more about class solidarity, he says 'yeah right tough guy'
Cowboys
five of the cowboys are in town and this time they mean it
Eternal Vigilance of Infinite Undiscovery
This is a movie that is actually a jrpg port for ps1. The game boots up on the silver screen and the projectionist cant figure out that you use circle instead of x to start the game, so its just 90 min of the title screen
Wheres my Porsche?
this is a movie ala dude wheres my car but its just a rich man who blames the valet
Comments (8)
A snow leopard ponders the meaning of existence but gets poached before he can figure it out.
The biography of a frustrated philosophy forum admin*.
* Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental**.
**That may be a lie***
***Do I win yet?
A pilot chef must avoid turbulence else the bread will not rise.
The King and You
Anna quits and becomes a baker.
Show me the Dough
A high paced, high staked corporate tycoon in bed with big bakery must wheel and deal while sustaining his coke high.
John Malkovich gets cucked by Al Yankovic for the part of John Malkovich in a movie about the inside of Malkovich's head.
Alone and afraid – deep inside the Trump Whitehouse. The true story of one cowardly resister.
solid gold