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Welcome to The Philosophy Forum - an indoctrination thread

S November 30, 2017 at 23:30 16000 views 38 comments
Welcome to The Philosophy Forum: this may all be pointless.

The Twelve Lessons

Lesson number 1: I am your Leader.

Lesson number 2: You will address me as your Leader.

Lesson number 3: I am brilliant.

Lesson number 4: I am wise.

Lesson number 5: I am always right.

Lesson number 6: You pale in comparison to me in every respect.

Lesson number 7: Your views don't matter.

Lesson number 8: Your life doesn't matter.

Lesson number 9: I own you.

Lesson number 10: You will not think for yourself without my permission.

Lesson number 11: You will never question my authority.

Lesson number 12: You will abide by these teachings at all times, and you will affirm that you have read, understood, and committed yourself to abiding by these teachings at all times.

Your Leader,
Sapientia

Comments (38)

BC November 30, 2017 at 23:50 #128993
Oh, great wise brilliant and authoritative leader, you failed to provide a check box to signal that we irrelevant, worthless, and pale worms had read, understood, and committed our abject selves to your most authoritative wise and brilliant leadership. Correct this deficiency immediately.

Be sure to add a "fuck you very much" box.

Meanwhile, back at the sweatshop where the moderators and administrators toil in ignominious degradation, unappreciated and unrewarded, people are decompensating and going off the deep end.
S December 01, 2017 at 00:02 #128997
Reply to Bitter Crank It is impossible for me to have failed. See lesson number 5.

With regards to your erroneous views about a perceived failure and the necessity of a check box and other such boxes, see lesson number 7.

You did not obtain my permission before thinking for yourself. See lesson number 10.
Aurora December 01, 2017 at 00:03 #128998
:D
Buxtebuddha December 01, 2017 at 00:06 #128999
Too bad this isn't entirely facetious.
S December 01, 2017 at 00:10 #129002
This is entirely serious. This is for the best.

You will agree with what I have just said.
S December 01, 2017 at 00:18 #129006
So, what do each of you think about your Leader? You will answer, and you will only say positive things about your Leader.
Baden December 01, 2017 at 00:18 #129007
A coup is it? Cool. I've changed your name to YourLeaderSapientia to help things along. (I've forgotten how to change it back though so I hope this whole thing goes well.)
S December 01, 2017 at 00:20 #129008
Reply to Baden You will change my name back when I order you to do so.
Aurora December 01, 2017 at 00:24 #129010
Quoting YourLeaderSapientia
So, what do each of you think about your Leader? You will answer, and you will only say positive things about your Leader.


I didn't know you before this thread, but I have to say, you've left a very good first impression on me, my leader.
S December 01, 2017 at 00:29 #129013
Quoting Aurora
I didn't know you before this thread, but I have to say, you've left a very good first impression on me, my leader.


This follower has set a good example. The rest of you will take heed and fall in line. Dissent will not be tolerated.
SapientiasLittleHelper December 01, 2017 at 00:48 #129017
All hail YourLeaderSapientia!
BC December 01, 2017 at 01:05 #129023
Sig Heil, Heil, mein Führer, and all that. As for you mein kleiner Führer... Wir haben Wege you might not like so much. For one, no Saint Nicholas swag for you this year. Der Widerstand formt sich im Keller.
BC December 01, 2017 at 01:11 #129024
Occidit omnes tyrannis!
BC December 01, 2017 at 01:13 #129025
Tyranni infelici casu fortasse.
Wosret December 01, 2017 at 01:18 #129026
Where we going?
Baden December 01, 2017 at 01:38 #129028
S December 01, 2017 at 01:49 #129032
Quoting SapientiasLittleHelper
All hail YourLeaderSapientia!


:D (Y)
Janus December 01, 2017 at 02:11 #129036
Reply to YourLeaderSapientia

You have forgotten the unlucky lesson number 13: Leader has small dick which creates inferiority complex leading to grandiose fantasies of power and superiority.
The lesson here, oh unlucky one, is that all the other lessons may safely be ignored, because leader's bark issues from a toothless maw.
Noble Dust December 01, 2017 at 02:12 #129037
S December 01, 2017 at 02:21 #129041
SapientiasLittleHelper December 01, 2017 at 03:07 #129049
Reply to Janus

@YourLeaderSapientia instructed you to say only positive things about him. That is not positive. This is your final warning.

Baden December 01, 2017 at 03:52 #129051
Reply to SapientiasLittleHelper

OK, I'm positive YourLeaderSapientia has a small dick.

SapientiasLittleHelper December 01, 2017 at 03:52 #129052
Reply to Baden

That does not meet the criteria. This is your final warning.
BC December 01, 2017 at 04:18 #129057
There are too many owl vomit pellets around here.


TimeLine December 01, 2017 at 06:40 #129077
Quoting YourLeaderSapientia
Lesson number 6: You pale in comparison to me in every respect.


I'm rather tanned, actually.
SapientiasLittleHelper December 01, 2017 at 07:12 #129080
Reply to TimeLine

Does not meet criteria. Final warning.
T Clark December 01, 2017 at 09:12 #129090
Quoting YourLeaderSapientia
?Janus SapientiasLittleHelper, sick him [sic]!


It's "sic em."
S December 01, 2017 at 13:17 #129147
Quoting T Clark
It's "sic em."


No it's not. See lesson 5.
SapientiasLittleHelper December 01, 2017 at 14:43 #129156
Reply to T Clark

Your trial / execution has been scheduled for dawn tomorrow. It will be fair and balanced. Please bring your confession.
Michael December 01, 2017 at 15:10 #129159
Quoting SapientiasLittleHelper
YourLeaderSapientia instructed you to say only positive things about him. That is not positive. This is your final warning.


In ancient Greece, the birthplace of philosophy, a small penis was seen as better than a large penis. @Janus was being positive.

Edit: Also, I'm going to ban you for being a sockpuppet.
praxis December 01, 2017 at 15:31 #129168
Quoting YourLeaderSapientia
Lesson number 9: I own you.


A responsible owner will cover medical expenses. FYI, think I’m starting to feel a tooth ache.
Ciceronianus December 01, 2017 at 16:11 #129171
You know, the Leader is saying exactly what Plato's Philosopher-King would say, though far less succinctly.
T Clark December 01, 2017 at 17:12 #129180
Quoting YourLeaderSapientia
It's "sic em." — T Clark
No it's not. See lesson 5.


I guess "sick him" is an alternative spelling used by high falutin leaders and such, i.e. by my betters.
Janus December 01, 2017 at 19:43 #129209
Reply to YourLeaderSapientia

No, it is you that is sick...you need help, and not in the way you think.
Janus December 01, 2017 at 19:51 #129210
Quoting Michael
In ancient Greece, the birthplace of philosophy, a small penis was seen as better than a large penis. Janus was being positive.


Yes, that could well be true; which means YourLeaderSapienta has not acquired control even over himself; he is a helpless victim of modern body image ideals. ( Perhaps he watches too much porn). If he could only accept his small dick and be comfortable in his own skin, then he would no longer feel the need to imagine that he controls, and is superior to, others. His "regime" is a sad joke, and everyone is laughing about it but him.
S December 01, 2017 at 23:28 #129254
Reply to Janus Nah, youz jus jelly.
BC December 02, 2017 at 06:03 #129295
Quoting Michael
In ancient Greece, the birthplace of philosophy, a small penis was seen as better than a large penis.


The professor said the ancient Greeks thought that a big penis was comic--Wikipedia says 'grotesque'. Of course, this insight is based on damned little recorded gossip by the ancient Greeks which would reveal what they really thought. They did seem to prefer small dicks on sculptures. On the other hand, the Greeks employed phallus sculpture as part of the cult of Hermes in his function as a fertility god. (As opposed to Hermes Psychopomps). The phallus sculptures were sometimes quite large.

There is a reference to a shortage of dildos in Lysistrata -- the war seems to have interrupted the supply. Aristophanes didn't say how large the dildos were. There is also a joke about erections visible through clothing--the sex strike by the women had left the men very horny. Presumably their actual dicks were big enough to be noticeable under a robe. "It's not the heat, it's the tumidity" is the modern version of the joke.
Janus December 02, 2017 at 22:52 #129438
Quoting Sapientia
Nah, youz jus jelly.


Aaarrrggghhh, no...the wit...